He’s a reader who I met and became friends with. We don’t see each other much though, but we text every so often. I received a call from him a couple of weeks ago. He broke some news. And it was great news. It would be an honor. It would be flattering. It would make me proud. But I was still in disbelief. I needed to see it for myself. Or hear it for myself rather. So I did.
What the frick am I talking about? I was apparently mentioned in a Fabcast, which is a podcast of THE fabulous people, the Fabcasters. And not just any Fabcast, mind you. This was the Fifteen Favorite Blogs of the Fabcasters.
Wehhhhh?! Totoo?
Searching for the entry on the site of ManilaGayGuy, I fortunately found it. So apparently, they listed down fifteen of their favorite blogs – not necessarily the best or the top, just their personal favorites – that are gay-originated or oriented, and definitely Pinoy. Check, and check...
And indeed, I was there, first mentioned! Well, not necessarily because I was the best, or the kulelat at that. I was just lucky to come first in alphabetical order. Hehehe. I’ll take it!
Apparently, it was an AJ who nominated my blog. Not sure if this is “Baklang AJ” of the BaklaAkoMayReklamo blog, who I remember commenting on my past blog entries. Whoever this AJ is, Migs, the ManilaGayGuy reveals him to be an acronym for Ang Jojologs...
I giggle everytime I hear the part where he playfully teases, “Jologs nga!” Hehehe, everytime! EVERYTIME! He took it back anyways, saying, “Magfe-favorite ba tayo ng panget?” Even if he possibly meant it, who cares?! Ain’t nothing wrong about being jologs!
Of course, I didn’t stop the Fabcast after hearing my blog. I was curious who else was on the list. And what good company it was... Here are the other blogs on the list:
BaklangMaton
Chuvaness, apparently a writer of the Philippine Star... Wow!
CityBuoy, who has won at the Philippine Blog Awards
DiscreetManila
HotMenInThePhilippines
FickleCattle, a lawyer by profession... Ooh!
JessicaRulesTheUniverse, no less than Jessica Zafra! Whoa!
Lexuality, director and screenwriter Lex Bonife of Lalake sa Parola and Kambyo, and who I’ve met and yoga-ed with!
MandayaMoore
MisterHubs, the blogger I’ve said in the past I’d like to meet, and have!
TheBaklaReview
TheProfessionalHeckler
Tiggah'sLife, apparently an exhibitionist – interesting – from California
and TristanTales, a friend from Washington DC... but rival for the malibog at malandi throne, hehehe.
Whew! Even if I were actually just the fifteenth ranked, still an honor to be in this list!
Answering why they came up with this list, the Fabcasters say they wish to encourage more people to read these worthy blogs. Naks.
So to Migs the ManilaGayGuy, Gibbs Cadiz, McVie, CC (who I believe is supposed to be CorporateCloset), Tony, and AJ, MARAMING MARAMING SALAMAT! and THANK YOU! and WORLD PEACE!
Listen to the Fabcast here.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Feb & Favorite
Sunday, August 08, 2010
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Über Proud
I took a day off from work this Tuesday that just passed. Nope, I wasn’t sick or anything. No emergency either. I just had stuff to take care of.
What can I say? I’m in demand.
Hehehe, just kidding. I just really needed to do some stuff, that’s all.
I woke up and left my usual time, but in just a pair of shorts and flip-flops. I was to take a trip to the Social Hygiene Clinic in Manila. The first time again since almost a year ago. I met up with someone who I encountered thru Positivism, to accompany him to get tested. Honestly, with his nursing background, he was at the point where he knew too much for his own good. That didn’t leave much for me to do other than give emotional support and lighten the mood. Seeing Dra. Diana and Nurse Malou there was great. They did recognize me and seemed happy to see me, too.
So I got my new friend pricked, and we waited an hour for the results of the Rapid Test, which really wasn’t too rapid. Ate Malou was saying it was the routing of the results for signature that took a while. We whiled away the time chatting it up with her and the volunteer who was on duty. After an hour, jubilance. He was negative for HIV. Woohoo!
From there, I headed home to take lunch and change into pants for an afternoon meeting. I had been corresponding closely for the past few months with someone from the Department of Education, who watched me on GMA’s Think Positive and contacted me through this blog. I could sense he understood and shared the advocacy. And soon he mentioned that they were coming up with an HIV module which they might need help with. I was game... but didn’t really know what exactly I was getting into. Hehe.
A couple of weeks ago, he told me they were setting up a day to meet with me and the other resource person. Wow, so I was a resource person? I was wondering who the other one would be, but soon found out it was none other than my good friend, E! We were pretty happy and relieved to realize we would be in it together. I dunno, there’s just a level of comfort that we get from going through new things together. Well, for me at least, that’s the case.
So we met up and headed to the DepEd compound in Ortigas. We really had no idea what the meeting would be about. Mr. DepEd had mentioned that an HIV Specialist from UNICEF would be attending too, which gave us an idea of how big and how serious this was going to be. Ergo, seeing E in pants and shoes for a change was more appropriate than hilarious. I was nervous, honestly.
Getting there, we finally met Mr. DepEd, and were asked to wait a while in the conference room. Soon after, we were joined by four other ladies from the DepEd, as well as the pretty, statuesque German lady from UNICEF. This is really is it. Gulp. It turned out, this was for a Training of Trainers thing on HIV issues, set for November and December, for faculty and student leaders of schools nationwide. I know... Whoa.
Apparently, with what Mr. DepEd had known about E and I, our reputations had preceded us. We were both known to be HIV-positive bloggers. I graduated from reputable schools, and was editor of Positivism. E was an opinionated dude who has braved all odds and was about to get published. All true, all true. But little did we know that this was just the start of our proving our cases that we would be good resource persons... resource persons who were going to give our testimonials, help to put a face to HIV, and be part of an open forum, speaking in front of crowds of at around a hundred. Yikes.
E and I both got grilled a bit regarding the stories of our lives. But knowing E and I, we could tell nothing more than what was the truth. We’re both pretty much at a point where we’re responsible for the mistakes we’ve made but still have much to be thankful for, so certainly we weren’t going to be sugarcoating anything we were going to say.
For E, it was pretty awkward to talk about his having to exchange money for sex, his drug addiction, and how he veered off track from his family. For me, the awkwardness was more about the issue of homosexuality and my apparent issues on disclosure, not being able to tell my family about my condition.
I wouldn’t say we were defending ourselves the whole time. We weren’t trying to be perfect. It was more of like we were trying to help them understand all the factors behind who we are. After all, this may have just been the first time for some of the people there to have met and talked to people who were living with HIV. So were we going to be perfect role models for the youth of today? Certainly not. But what I can say is that we weren’t bad images of people living with HIV to leave with an audience.
You should’ve seen us. We were handling the embarrassing questions, making our awkward confessions, shocking the hell out of the dignified ladies, making jokes, laughing at ourselves, but all the while making our points and, I believe, helping them understand. I realize now that it was such a light mood to be in, considering we were talking about HIV and AIDS. And that’s the way it should be. Very Positivism.
Leaving, E and I talked about what just transpired. We weren’t sure exactly how we did, but it was clear we were happy with what we did. We certainly had no regrets. Most would probably wonder why DepEd approached individuals like us instead of the existing NGOs. But for E and I, based on how we know the NGOs think and work, we doubt if it would be anything more than a pity fit if they were subjects.
Our bewilderment about whether we passed or not was put to some ease by a couple of text messages I received. Mr. DepEd said he was initially worried that we might have taken offense from some of the questions thrown at us, but was glad that we handled ourselves well. Ms. UNICEF meanwhile said she admired the positive attitude, and the patience with which the questions were faced. He added that he was now sure of the success of the event, while she hoped we would be indeed available for the training course. Wow, does that mean... I know, let’s wait and see. But I’m still amazed myself.
I’ve told E how über proud I was of us both, but really, I was über-düber proud of E in particular. Because other than the PSP he was carrying around yesterday, he was the man. He’s really come a long way, and he’s just such a changed man, I believe. And allow me to be a proud kuya.
So there, that was the huge adventure I had with E yesterday. At this point, it was a huge, huge opportunity offered to us. Humongous if we push through. So watch out, Subic and Cebu! The B.I.T.C.H.-E tandem might just be coming your way!
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Lucky Me!
With the Chinese New Year ushering in the Year of the Ox, everyone’s been talking about luck. And from all the features I’ve watched, 2009 should actually be a lucky year for me, being born in the Year of the Horse. But I believe my good luck started last year, when I found out I was HIV-positive.
You know that I’ve always regarded myself as lucky despite the fact that I’m now HIV-positive. I’m lucky that it isn’t some other more severely debilitating disease that I have. I’m lucky that I found out relatively early on that I had it, and still wasn’t manifesting any symptoms. I’m lucky that I had a pretty decent CD4 count to begin with. I’m lucky that I’ve gotten through the challenges of starting on ARVs. I’m lucky that I’ve made the choices to get to where I am now. I’m lucky to have encountered the greatest people along my HIV journey.
I was lucky to have chosen to get tested at the Social Hygiene Clinic in Manila, the personnel of which have been so kind until now. I was lucky to have encountered U, who introduced and took me to the RITM more than 6 months ago. I was lucky to have come across E, who’s become my poz blogger buddy. I was lucky to have met RITM’s resident counselor, who, through some ridiculous circumstances, was instrumental in linking me to the Positivism team. I was lucky to be introduced to Baby Nathan, who’s brought more passion and inspiration to my positive life. And of course, I’ve been lucky to have all the rest of the angels along the way, who’ve been so extremely supportive and accepting.
Being HIV-positive has afforded me some opportunities that I may never have gotten if I wasn’t. I’ve rediscovered my passion for writing, which has given me the chance to get noticed. Of course, there’s this very blog, and Positivism, which have kept my momentum going. I don’t know if it’s entirely lucky, but my writing has been heard by, or more like criticized by, one of the nation’s recognizable journalists. And once again, I stand the chance of being published for international circulation.
As of today, I can say that my lucky streak continues, and has overflowed onto my professional side, as I’m being given the opportunity to work for a great company, doing the very thing I love doing, and being the very person I cannot deny I am. I only dreamed of the possibility of pursuing a path where my creativity, writing and advocacy becoming a career. And I won’t deny that I would love to work with people who know about and are, as far as I know, comfortable with my being HIV-positive, and I am completely flattered by the fact that they see potential in me.
Of course it’s going to be a huge decision to make, and for someone who is intimidated by change, a very daunting one. Getting uprooted from what has become my comfort zone of almost 5 years just leaves me scared to the bone. Before this, the biggest change in my life has been HIV. Heaven knows how I’ve gotten past it still sane, assuming of course that I have gotten past it, and that I am indeed still sane. Someone just loves throwing me curve balls I guess. And I just have to step up to the plate swinging.
So maybe luck is just one part of the equation. Maybe I have to be a bit carefree. Maybe I have to have faith. Maybe I have to muster up enough courage. Maybe I have to give in to the risks. Maybe I have to be willing to step out of the box. Then, and only then, can luck play its part. Like someone said, you can’t win the lottery if you don’t buy a ticket.
