The day had come. I was in front of the telly as early as 9:00 pm, switching channels to and from Miss Congeniality 2, Extreme Makeover Home Edition, Top Design, and GMA 7, of course. I’m sorry, I just could not stand seeing Yaya Patani on Ful Haus, which finally ended around 11:00 pm. This is it. This is really is it.
At around 11:05, as my ARVs kicked in, the show started with a definition of HIV, moving into vignettes of Vicky Morales showing common myths regarding transmission. Wanggo Gallaga’s story then followed – his risks, acceptance, and disclosure. His dad, Peque Gallaga then frowned on how people connect conditions like HIV to being punishments from God. I had to nod my head to that. I was amazed to realize that all this was just the introduction to the program, as the title sequence swept in: Think Positive.
Earlier meant to focus on 18 to 25 year olds, I noticed they shifted the at-risk group to span up to the age of 29, and realized I did barely fit into this category, having been diagnosed just weeks before my 30th birthday. Should I feel proud? Not exactly. Hehe.
Following the first gap, they went into HIV testing. Vince, a seafarer, was to get a mandatory HIV test for employment – lo and behold – at the Social Hygiene Clinic in Manila! My very own! Kiko, a freelance writer, was also to get tested because he had been engaging in risky behavior. They showed a clip of the pre-test counseling, followed by a gut-wrenching shot of blood extraction. The thing that makes me go eeew.
As Vince and Kiko began the agonizing wait for their test results, the story transitioned to Echo, a counselor, who then discloses his HIV-positive status. He told his story towards the realization that life still has meaning, in spite of HIV.
Going back, we followed Vince and Kiko’s blood samples to the STD/AIDS Cooperative Central Laboratory, or SACCL, where they gave us an idea of how the tests are done. Vicky Morales then stated how opportunistic infections, and not AIDS, are the killers. Perfecto. A Dr. Avelino of the Philippine National AIDS Council, or PNAC, then discussed the modes of transmission of the virus, and how it may take years after infection for symptoms to arise.
Finally, Vince’s test results were handed to him by my own Dr. Diana Mendoza of the SHC. I was stunned when, as the doctor told him he’s negative, he actually needed to cry on her shoulder. Considering he wasn’t blurred out, I just thought to myself, hmm, this is disclosure of a different kind. Hehe. Okay I’m an ass, sorry. Kiko was negative as well, but still within the window period. He did however speak about realizing the need to protect himself from then on. Truly, positive or negative, HIV tests are life changing.
DOH statistics were next, where, as of 2008 records, there are 3,589 Filipinos with HIV. Estimated true value? Almost double that. A total of 528 were diagnosed in 2008 alone, of which I am just one. Highest prevalence was among age groups 25-29 and 30-34, and 70% were male. One shocking number was that 42% of those diagnosed in December of 2008 were aged from 15 to 24 years, and mostly MSM, or men who have sex with men. Fifteen years old?! Geez.
Several vignettes of Filipinos living with HIV followed. Greg was diagnosed in Dubai prior to the start of his employment. Though he ended with a life-must-go-on attitude, he ushered in the internet as a potential risk factor for the spread of the virus, via personals sites, sex eyeballs and the like. Me? Guilty.
Segueing from the HIV and AIDS situation around the world, a couple of Filipinos living with HIV in the United States were shown. With Charles’ story, came the fact that 31% of HIV-infections in San Francisco are Filipino-Americans, attributing to the apparent ease with which Filipinos blend with western cultures. Henry came next, telling of his current partner of 10 years who is HIV-negative. Indeed, there is hope! Hehe.
Before taking the story back to local soils, I need to point out how doctors in the US have a “cleaning” method for HIV-positive sperm, in order to keep an HIV-negative woman safe when attempting pregnancy. Very interesting.
Back to ‘Pinas, Elvira was next, who I recognized to be my S. I encountered her before at the RITM, remember? She was the female face in this HIV documentary, as she told of the time when medical personnel in Bicol refused to treat her ailing child because they were both HIV-positive, even threatening to have them thrown in jail. Sadly, this caused the eventual demise of her child. But bouncing back, she is proud to be the not-so-stereotypical HIV-positive person, and is now a project coordinator with one of the NGOs.
A short description of Republic Act 8504, the Philippine AIDS Prevention and Control Act of 1998, made way for John, who worked for a call center, and was diagnosed in February of 2008 during a pre-employment medical exam for a job opportunity abroad. He was monogamous with his partner at the time – ergo, not my promiscuous type – but still was exposed to the virus.
And there it was. A guy sitting in front of a computer, surfing and typing. Ngarrr, okay, it was me. The B.I.T.C.H. was on TV. I think I spaced out recognizing myself on the screen. I was cold. I was feverish. I don’t know if it was because I was self-conscious, or it was just the meds. I don’t remember much, other than seeing how bad my posture was and hearing myself explain why I decided to start blogging and describing HIV as nandito na and napapag-usapan. You be the judge.
Positivism wasn’t part of the story, other than a few screen shots that I saw and some videos which were reminiscent of those we have on the e-mag. Darn. Maybe next time.
The plot thickened as they featured statement from the CBCP putting the kontra into contraception again, but thankfully ending with the proposed Reproductive Health Bill which is going through its legislative paces.
A little past midnight, the documentary ended with a reminder of the ABCDEs that can help keep one safe from the virus. Eeeehh memorize ko na yan! Hehe.
Was it just me, or did anyone notice how heavy a commercial load the show had for a late Sunday evening? Were companies actually willing to support this once taboo topic? That’s a good sign, right?
Anyways, other than the fact that it went way past my bedtime, and not because I was part of it, and not even because it seemed to give so much mileage to this blog, I gave the documentary four thumbs up. Yes, four thumbs, because I was cross-eyed with my drowsiness and medicinal high combined. Hehehe.
But seriously, although I would have really wanted it to really take the “positive” angle of HIV to its happiest maximum... and although I thought it was still too huge an issue to cramp into an hour... I thought it was PERFECTO!
Again, kudos to the people who worked on this. "World View Presents Think Positive!" was produced by GMA News and Public Affairs. Executive producer and writer, Jay Orense. Writer and researcher, Glenn Ala. Director and segment producer, Maey Bautista. Researcher, Marie Ann Saballegue. Uhm, is there any way we can get a copy of this? :-D
What did you think about it?
Monday, April 13, 2009
Think Positive!
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Things I've Learned
Christmas this year has been so different. It’s been an extended holiday season, but I’ve become thankful that I didn’t get my wish to sleep through the holidays. I’ve had a healthy balance between staying rested and keeping busy, and been swamped with almost every emotion there is, more happy moments than sad, I’m pleased to say.
The usual family stuff has been there, but with the several days that have been dedicated to helping Baby Nathan’s family out, they’ve become my second family as well. It’s been almost a week since Christmas passed, and still the season of giving remains. And with everything that has been happening, I can say that I have been learning a lot.
Here are just some of them...
I’ve sort of been able to generalize that people who drive Mazda 3s are seemingly extremely generous persons. You know who you are. I’m thankful, but hoping generosity is not limited to them.
I’ve seen how much fun unexpected plans can be, when a quick shopping trip spins off into a bakal-boys-hour slash dirty-secrets-Q&A-portion slash movie-date. I’m still trying to analyze if doors really do slam silently when done by the hearing-impaired.
I’ve shared the panic of being put on the spot and wanting to run away from a well-meaning bible-study-preacher person, but not having any polite way of doing so. I’m relieved to know I’m not the only one who’s not into it.
I’ve realized how the mascot effigies at fastfood chains can be such good points of reference when eyeballing with someone. I’m just thinking of how to phrase things better than I’m the guy staring at Ronald McDonald’s ass.
I’ve learned that ladies should be careful who they’re caught grocery-shopping with. Anyone of the opposite sex, even if it’s a discreet gay friend, will always be thought to be your boyfriend. I’m wondering how much worse the rumors would’ve been if we were caught with baby diapers in the shopping cart. This might be the first and the last time you'll hear this from me, but Our kids would've been beautiful!
And vice versa, discreet gay guys should be careful who they’re caught grocery shopping with, too. Anyone of the opposite sex, even if it’s just a friend, might be thought to be your – Gasp! – girlfriend. Again, I’m glad no one I knew caught us with diapers in our shopping cart. No offense, but Eeeeew! I have a reputation to protect, ya know!
Okay, okay, now seriously...
Being able to help Baby Nathan out these past holidays has been anything short of an eye-opener. I’ve been thanked myself a lot for helping them out, but I maintain that I am only a medium, and the real angels are the people who come from out of nowhere to lend a helping hand. I mean I might have the affinity to this kid just because we are both HIV positive and it is but natural for us in the poz community to, as they say, love your own. But these people who’ve been stepping up to the plate and giving whole-heartedly have been people from heaven knows where, who’ve chosen to look past the boundaries of our minority, welcoming themselves into our little community and us into theirs.
So the real learning for me in all of this is that, as much as so many people have been opening their hearts to put smiles on the faces of Baby Nathan and his family during the holidays, we must realize how Baby Nathan is serving as an angel himself, a tool to bridge the gap between the HIV-positive and the HIV-negative, and show that we are still human and that everyone, regardless of gender, orientation and HIV status, can work together.
In this case, clearly HIV is not merely a disease. It is not a punishment. HIV has served as a tool in itself, a tool that possibly the heavens have sent down to give us humans the opportunities to show compassion, to cooperate, and to prove that there is still hope in the world. A tool that didn’t come in a completely pleasant form, but, as we are beginning to see, serves its purpose to show we are not living in a fallen and hopeless world.
Okay, so maybe the country is not completely ready for the reality of HIV. Maybe majority of people still cultivate the stigma attached to HIV. But I can firmly say that the times are changing. Slowly, but surely. I’ve been taking baby steps for some time now, and I’m happy to realize that more and more people are willing to take those baby steps, too... with me, and towards me.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
The Buzz!
It’s been almost three months since I started this blog. I admit I’m not blogging as often as before, but probably because I’d been dealing with blow after blow of new discoveries, new issues, new problems, and new learnings, especially back in May. My learning curve has tapered off a bit by this time, but I know more is to come.
I was so shocked when I received my first comment from you guys on this blog. I never thought I’d get any feedback, let alone any readers. At this point, three months after, I probably have almost every sort of reader I could get. Every kind of person, from the poz and the not, from in and around the Philippines to beyond our humble shores, and from guys I’ve actually had the chance to meet to those who chose to peep from behind anonymity.
Initially blogging seemed to be a one way thing, where I bombard you with my information, and stuff it all down your gut. But it has evolved into more. So much in fact, that the online interactions I’ve made here have needed to break through the confines of the blogging world, and have spun off onto the e-mail, sms and instant messaging networks.
So this is for those who want to get in touch with me through IM. I’ve put a widget on my sidebar which will show if I’m online on Yahoo! Messenger or not. I tested it out a bit before finally putting it up, and so far it works fine.
Right now, I am 
I realize it’s pretty ironic for me to be treading the line that separates anonymity from notoriety, but I’m taking the risk of outing myself to maybe be of assistance to others who need support, sympathy, knowledge, or maybe even just entertainment.
I know at times I’ve been doubted, contradicted and maybe even dissed, but I’m just thankful for the time that’s been taken to hear my little story. Because in spite of that, I value most the sympathy and support that I get from you guys… it’s absolutely overwhelming. So if you wanna get in touch with me for anything… anything at all… just drop me a Buzz!
Three months doesn’t sound like much, but it’s been 90 days of introspection and being thankful for everything good I have. This blog has made my life a bit easier to live. So actually, more than being 90 days of keeping this blog alive, it’s more like this blog has been keeping me alive.
