Going for my CD4 count last week, I had previously heard cases of CD4s going up and down by over 150 points. With that in mind, the least that I was really wishing for was that it not go down and I be told that my ARVs weren’t working, and that they’d possibly have to be changed, which would mean another round of trials and adjustments.
Truth be told, upon receiving the slip of paper from Ate where she’d written our CD4 counts, I read it initially as 404. And with that, I was happy enough. But noticing a little loop on top of what I thought was a zero, Ate confirmed that indeed, it was an eight that she had written, making it a 484. That just left me even more amazed.
So with that accomplishment, I’ve been asked what my secret was. How did I do it? Geesh, honestly, I don’t know. Let me think.
When it came to food, I didn’t really make many changes. I’ve consciously been trying to eat more, increasing my rice intake from one a meal to 1½ or sometimes even 2 cups a meal. I’m still eating anything and everything there is. Rice, bread, pasta, pork, beef, chicken, fish... even fruits and vegetables.
I’ve always been a veggie eater, which I’ve heard is a good thing. My favorite? Gisadong ampalaya. Yum. I get that once a week from the little canteen near where I work. Luckily, ampalaya or bitter gourd was the particular vegetable that the resident counselor at the RITM says is good for people like us living with HIV. I don’t exactly know why that is. But I might be a testament to its efficacy.
Surprisingly, I’m choosier when it comes to fruits. First of all, I only like the fruits that I grew up knowing. I don’t enjoy “seedy” fruits either. And I hate the smell of oranges and the like. That leaves me with mango cheeks, canned pineapples, fruit cocktails, peach halves, seedless grapes, raisins and bananas.
I did try to get into a milk phase earlier into my ARVs. I started off with a glass of milk every night, but was overcome by my long-standing fear of milk causing me diarrhea, so I reduced my intake to just over the weekends, or with cereals for snacks. But I’ve just gotten too lazy. I’m now only able to take milk when I feel like it, when I remember it, and when I put my mind to it.
Food supplements are zero at the moment. I started off taking multivitamins, but ran out of them back in November. Anyone ever notice how expensive they are? So anyway, since that time, I haven’t gotten back to taking them. Despite that, I’m doing pretty good I think. I noticed I haven’t been catching coughs or colds as easily as before.
Alcohol intake is still the same as before, occasional. I did say I had my fair share of drinking during the holidays, but since that, almost nothing, which is normal for me. After the new year, the next taste of it I had was a single bottle of beer up in Tagaytay. That’s been the last, too.
I do believe that getting enough rest is a big factor. I’ve always been an eight-hour a day sleeper, and I make my zzz quota maybe 90% of the time. That’s just the way I was built, I’m practically useless past my bedtime. On weekends, I even sneak in afternoon naps when I can.
And then of course, there’s the compliance with medications. I’m still on Isoniazid, a tuberculosis prophylactic, which the Doctor put me on for nine months. It was fortunate, having been possibly exposed to tuberculosis when I found out that a couple of job applicants at work flunked their medical exams because of it.
As for the ARVs, I’m proud to say I have never missed a day of taking them. I’ll admit though that sometimes the timing becomes a problem, especially when I’m with people to whom I’d rather not explain what exactly all the tablets are for, or when I’m caught on the way home and would rather not risk drinking water from heaven-knows-where just to gulp them down. I think the most that I’ve missed my daily schedule by was maybe two to three hours. But shhhhh, don’t rat me out, okay?
Those factors might just be the tip of the iceberg. Of course, there are all the psychological, emotional, and maybe even sexual factors that might come into play. Heaven knows which ones I’m doing right, and which ones I’m not. In any case, I still believe thinking and living positively go a long, long way. My secret is out.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
My Secret
Monday, June 23, 2008
Changes
It’s been a neutral weekend. With the typhoon that just hit Manila, it more or less kept me cooped up at home, which is not such a bad thing for me. I spent most of the weekend lazing around and stuffing myself. The power outages didn’t help though.
I realize that the weather will now be a constant battle for me. There will always be the fear of being more susceptible to coughs and colds due to the HIV. I will need to stay dry, stay warm and stay healthy. Not quite far from my usual.
I’m the type of guy who always has an umbrella in his bag just in case. I am also the type, though, who will wade through floods, not afraid of getting wet. That will probably have to change. Just this weekend, being the “man” of the house, I needed to do some work outdoors, sweeping up the debris and clearing out the drainages in the middle of the rain. I tried to keep dry with an umbrella, but with the wind and all, a tough act. I don’t currently have an alibi to get out of the work around the house, that won’t make me look bratty or lazy.
I started pondering on the issue of adjustments when someone asked me what changes I had made since finding out that I had HIV.
Strikingly, sexual activity has taken a steep decline. Unsafe practices down to zero. Flirting on the net is now confined to mere flirting. Just trying to keep my online persona alive, fading out slowly in the following months, I expect. Other forms of sexuality, more focused on self-satisfaction continue as usual, or have probably increased as substitutes to actual contact.
Other lifestyle issues like vices came to mind. Smoking is not a problem with me, as I don’t smoke. I’ve never been the type to be disgusted with smokers, and have never had problems hanging out with them. I will just have to be cautious probably of second-hand smoke. I’ve never been a frequent drinker. Although I did inherit and develop a high tolerance for alcohol, thanks to my father’s habits. So a big drinker, I am, but a frequent drinker, I am not. But still I’ll have to cut down further. Probably have to have an excuse ready, like allergies or something.
As for other activities, nothing much has changed. I still take the commute to work. I still am able to walk 30 minutes a day to and from the transportation routes. I still eat the usual stuff, although I’ve been advised to stay away from uncooked food, such as Japanese stuff and even fresh salads. My guard is up, though, against any signs of diarrhea. I need to be cautious of that. Hygiene will also be important. More than before, that is. I’ve always wanted to work out, but never had the guts to. This might just be enough reason and opportunity for me to consider it seriously. Rest has always been important to me, and being a true blue eight-hour sleeper is a huge advantage for me now.
Looking through my list makes me look shallow and so short-sighted. But that’s how it is now. I can’t be so far-sighted. Long term plans are virtually non-existent, as my whole existence itself hangs in the balance. So for now, short term seems to be the immediate concern. I work to eat, and eat to live. And I live in the day. Because essentially, that’s what I want to do, just live. Even if it happens to be a short life, I will live it.
