Unacceptably Accepted

In Positivism's last poll, readers were asked how it would affect their relationship with a friend or family member if they found out that that person was HIV-positive. Of the almost 200 respondents, around 68% said it would make their bond stronger, 27% said it wouldn’t change a thing, while just 5% said it would force them apart.

Looking at those results, the scales seem to be really tipped in favor of those with HIV, right? So much support. So much acceptance. So much love. And as someone who is HIV-positive, I should be so extremely happy with those results… supposedly. But… I’m not.

I am HIV-positive, yes.

But no, I am not HIV.

Quite frankly, I cannot fathom any other notion than that HIV does not define me. And that being said, suddenly having HIV should not change who I am, right?

So if you suddenly like me more now that I’m HIV positive, what’s the contributing factor to that? It can’t be anything else than the HIV. It’s like reverse stigma… but stigma nonetheless. Grr.

I just feel that if having HIV becomes the reason for someone to become closer to me all of a sudden, then it probably has some sense of pity or charity behind it. And no… as much as I don’t want shame, I don’t want pity either.

I’d much rather have people I know say that finding out I had HIV won’t change a thing. If they love me, then they still love me. If they hate me, then they still hate me. HIV just shouldn’t be a part of the equation of hate and love. Nuff said.

I am HIV-positive, yes.

But no, I am not HIV.

Because the bottom line is that I am still me. But then again, that’s just me.

- republished from Positivism's Ka-Blog